Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Addressing Questions...

I've been asked several questions and even been posed a few scenarios, whether through comments left on this blog or private emails.  I'm finally getting around to answering those, even if the original person who asked never reads the answer.

First, one man said that he was a sperm donor because he is a Christian and sited Isaiah 4:1.  He writes:
I try to fufill the cry in Isaiah 4:1 "In those latter days 7 women will take hold of one man and cry take away our reproach and give us children"

There are several problems with this but I'll just hit two.  The biggest problem is that Isaiah 4.1 doesn't actually say what he quotes.  I looked in at least 14 different translations of this verse, and only one says anything about children (that version was The Message which I don't even consider a good source).  The English Standard Version says:
And seven women shall take hold of one man in that day, saying, "We will eat our own bread and wear our own clothes, only let us be called by your name; take away our reproach."

These women wanted to be married!  Yes, they wanted children, too, but the point was not JUST to have children but to be married.  This actually flies in the face of sperm donation, even more so sperm donations to lesbians because women can never be married to women in the true sense of the word, no matter what laws are passed. 

The second issue is this: God created marriage.  God created sex.  God created sex for marriage.  When we take sex outside of the context of marriage, we consequently take the chance of creating a child outside of that relationship.  Even sperm donation/artificial insemination, which isn't sex, is the creation of a child outside of the marriage and it's wrong.  When did making babies without sex become right and normal?

So while I think that this particular gentleman's goal is to help people, it isn't biblically sound.

Movin' on...

Karen commented:
As far as I understand, Jesus was the first 'artifically conceived' child person in historial record. That did not make Joseph any less his dad nor did it change their love for each other. But it goes without saying that Jesus knew who his father was and had very meaningful relationship with him.

Yeah!  I realized this a day or two after I learned of my conception.  Jesus was not raised by a biological father, yet because Jesus was without sin, I know he honored Joseph and loved him dearly.  God's goal for His children is to make us more like Christ in how we think and act.  It was an encouragement to know that Jesus was in a similar situation (though with VAST differences) to me.


Yes, I am glad I'm alive.  Disliking how I got here has nothing to do with liking that I'm here now.

Yes, I love my Dad.  Looking for my biological father in no way negates my love for my dad.

Yes, I still call him Dad.  I'm pretty sure he wouldn't appreciate being called by his first name.

No, I will not write a thank you note to my parents for raising me simply because I was conceived via AI.  I didn't have anything to do with it.

No, I will not write them a thank you note just because my Dad loved me even though I'm not biologically his.  He and my mother made the decision together to have me so he's supposed to raise me and love me.  (It seems like there is a Chris Rock joke in there somewhere)  It's called being a dad. 

Instead, I tell them all the time that I love them.  I do my best to honor them in every way.  I've thanked them repeatedly over the years for taking care of me.  I thank them because I love them and it's my joy to thank them and to be thankful to God for them.

So this is turning out to be much longer than what I intended it to be and I'm not done yet.  Maybe one more post will finish it up.


  1. Hi -

    I stumbled upon your blog awhile back and have been silently rooting for you to get the answers you're looking for.

    I also have just found this whole topic interesting, so I was poking around on other blogs that address the subject of donor offspring.

    You've probably already either read this argument against donor insemination, or else thought of it yourself. But in case not, I thought this was a really interesting observation, especially for someone considering bringing a child into the world in that way:

    Parents who argue for using donors will often minimize the resulting children's need (or desire) to know both biological parents. They will say that as long as the children are loved by their social parents, having a biological relationship should not be important.

    But what's interesting about that argument is that the people using donors typically do so BECAUSE having a biological relationship to their children is so important to THEM. Otherwise, instead of pursuing pregnancy through any possible means, they would look to building their families through adoption.

  2. I definitely agree with you that the Christian sperm donor didn't use a good argument but at the same time, there really is no evidence that donor conception is scripturally wrong or "not biblically sound." It's one of those things that the bible isn't clear on one way or the other. With that said, it is better to focus on what is or isn't practical in this case.